21st October

Cher journal,

Today marks one year since my attempted suicide. I find it difficult to see progress in long-term things, but when I think about where I was a year ago in comparison to now, I am very proud of myself.

Yes, I still suffer from mental illness and, yes, I still have bad days, but in terms of my mindset? I’ve found so many things that are worth living for. I feel incredibly grateful for all I have and how far I’ve come.

For those of you that read my last blog post, I am still in France! I’m really enjoying life here and I’ve met some lovely people. I miss my friends and family a lot, but I’m determined to make the most of my time here. I started my teaching job two weeks ago and it’s been going really well; my students are so intelligent! I feel very at home here.

Last week I was told some bad news about my family, and although it’s made being away from home a lot more difficult, I am looking forward to returning home at Christmas. I would return sooner, to simply show support and be with my family during a difficult time, but unfortunately with all the COVID-19 restrictions, it’s not really possible for me to go back to England at the moment.

Despite the bad news, I have been doing well, mostly keeping busy with work and finding new places to visit in Bourges. I’ve been baking a lot in my spare time and making sure my house is clean! My goal is that my house always looks tidy and smells of apple pie!

A song that’s been giving me motivation recently is Ritual by Wrabel.


Emelie x


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